just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
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