I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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