she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
