Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
