he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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