No stitches, just platelets and will power
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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