my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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