White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
