just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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