Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
