Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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