It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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