there was a trapeze. enough said
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
