I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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