Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
the day after is always just damage control
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Randomize
