i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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