Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Randomize
