I need help removing her.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
