getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize