I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
