So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize