hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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