I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
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