hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
He? As in you personified your dick?
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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