i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Dick very happy bro
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
