so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
the liver wants what the liver wants
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
