Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
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