Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize