found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Damn victory sex feels great
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
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