we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
