apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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