tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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