Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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