Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Randomize
