Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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