he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
