this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize