oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
