hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize