Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
