he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
