I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
