I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I'm just crazy horny about you
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
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