drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize