You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
