planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Randomize
