okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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