Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Randomize
