is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
40s are totally the cure
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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