did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
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