I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
organizing the empties. That sober.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Randomize
